Accessing Program: JL13E
by Didi
Summary: A special program for a viewing of one. Jubilee


**Accessing Program: JL13-E**

By: Didi

**Disclaimer:**  Everything but the idea is owned by Marvel and Stan Lee.  

**Acknowledgement:**  This idea came after reading Mara Greengrass's "XDrabbles."  Girl, you are the goddess of fan fiction.  

**Summary:**  A special program for a viewing of one.  Jubilee.

**Author's Note:**  Give me a break on this story.  It was written quickly and on a spur of the moment kind of thing.    Also, this will be a one shot deal.

**Timeline:**  Hum… that's a rough one.  Assume everything in print at the moment would be the best way to go.  Not that you need to have read everything since this only deals with the most significant of events in X-Men history.  

~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~

            The clock by the bed read 2:44 AM in iridescent blue.  The house was quiet but for the usual creaking that never seem to go away.  She slipped out of bed and paused a moment to listen to her roommate's steady breathing.  Putting her feet into the blue bunny slippers and pulling on a ratty long robe she had unearthed in the attic from a collection of things Rogue had left behind, Jubilee quietly slipped from her room.  

            Paddling down the long hallway, she stopped every once in a while to listen to snoring and sleepy mutters from behind closed doors.  Wincing as she stepped on yet another loose floorboard, Jubilee wondered for a moment if someone had intentionally loosen the boards so not to allow unknown elements to roam around the school in the middle of the night.  While it did make sense given how often they seem to get attacked at the school, it made her job of getting around the house alone rather difficult.  

            Letting out a breath of relief as she made it to the head of the stair, she hopped on the banister and made her way down in a smooth and graceful slide that Bobby Drake and his ice-sled would have been envious of.  Landing on her feet, she glanced up to make sure no one was there; she smiled and headed for the subterranean levels of the school.  

            There was familiar beeping of machines from unknown locations as Jubilee roamed through the halls of the X-Men's command base.  Every once in a while, she stopped to glance at the framed photos of family and friends that lined the wall.  Jean Grey-Summer had most adamantly insisted on putting up familiar scenes to remind the X-Men constantly of what they were fighting to protect.  Jubilee was glad for that.  There were times during the darkest hours that she sometimes forgot why she had chosen to become an X-Men instead of simply walking away.

            A picture of Generation X in full uniform their first summer together captured her attention.  Jono, Paige, Mondo, Angelo, Everett, Monet, herself, Penance, Leech and Artie with Emma Frost and Sean Cassidy flanking them.  How happy they looked, even the unsmiling and unable to smile ones?  How innocent life had been?  How different they had all thought their futures would turn out?  Now… some were with the X-Men, some were missing in action, some rested in peace, and some had walked away.  

            Not that anyone that's ever put on an X sign could truly walk away from this life… no matter how hard they try.  

            She reached out and touched the framed photo; touched the laughing face of Everett Thomas, her first love, and the grinning visage of Angelo Espinosa, the one that loved her.  

            Swallowing the painfully tight feeling in her throat, she moved away.

            The steely grey doors of the Danger Room loomed in front of her.  For years after Logan had brought her to this place, she had been warned never to entered this hollow chamber alone.  Jean and Scott's gentle scolding had been lodged in the back of her mind.  Even now, knowing why she was here, she still hesitated, hearing the reminder in her head.  The control panel blinked at her.  

            Pressing the green button, she held her breath as the door hissed open like something out of Star Trek.  The lights within blinked on full.  Stepping in,  Jubilee held her breath again as the doors hissed shut, locking her in.  

            "Computer, access program JL13-E.  Authorization: Jubilation Lee, GX02024."  She wondered if Scott had been serious about changing her authorization codes to reflect her status as an X-Man now.  At one point in her life, that might have thrilled her to delirium.  But that time had passed and the idea barely registered in her mind as little more than an inconvenience.  

            The smooth female voice of the computer spoke.  "Voice recognition: processing.  Voice recognized:  Jubilation Lee.  Access granted.  Accessing program: JL13-E."  

            She never could explain why she had first sep up this program, a crazy moment of in her life perhaps, but she's never been able to let it go.  Over the years, it has been modified and changed and different versions of it had been created.   But the essence of it had remained the same.  As was the fact that this was one program she wouldn't and couldn't ever share.  

            The black walls with its soft green grids blinked for a moment then shimmered to pale blue.  A field of green appeared underfoot and soft lapse of wind ruffled Jubilee's hair.  The familiar checkered picnic blanket appeared before her along with the wicker basket of fried chicken and cheery apples.  A neat army of ants appeared around the blanket, marching its way to the food as it always does.  

            The five figures appeared last, one more person than in the old version of this familiar program.  

            Jubilee felt her throat closed for a moment as she stared, the leap of joy followed by the devastating grief as she remembered that this was just a computer program of her own making.  Just part of her memories and thoughts kept alive by micro chips.  But even so, the feeling was so real that for a moment, she was lost to it.  

            "Well, don't just stand there like a Greek statue, sit down," Illyana Rasputin laughed, waving her over with a tiny ten year's hand.  Her golden locks sparkled in the sun as she unpacked the basket eagerly.  "Did you pack lemonade like I told you to?"

            "How can she forget?" Peter Rasputin asked with a twinkling smile as he patted the seat by his side, the only empty space in the circle of people.  "You always ask for it."

            "With Jube's lousy memory?  Anything is possible," Everett Thomas teased and held out his hand to her.  Long fingers closed gently and warmly around Jubilee's smaller hand.  "Come on, Lee.  Sit down.  This picnic is your idea."

            She allowed herself to be pulled to her knees between Peter and Everett, still unable to loosen the tightening grief around her throat.  

            "What's the matter, Chica?  Gato has your tongue?" Angelo asked his superior grin fully in place as he pulled a cigarette from his pocket.

            "Do not tease her," Mondo admonished with gentle easy smile.  "Can you not see that she is not feeling well?"  

            "What's the matter?" Peter asked, his hand brushed against her forehead.  "Are you feeling ill?"

            Taking a deep breath to push back the tears that she knew were close to the surface, "No, I'm okay.  Let's enjoy the picnic."

            "Well said," Illyana replied happily as she poured lemonade into five cups.  "You're always so sad when we have our picnics."

            "She's remembering," Everett replied wisely as he piled chicken on everyone but Jubilee's plate.  The computer has a good memory. 

            "She remembers too much," Angelo rolled his eyes and took a drag from the cig.  "Kid, if it makes you so upset to come here, why do you keep doing it?  It's not like it's going to hurt our feelings if you don't come?"  

            "Angelo!" Everett reached over and whacked him in the arm.  "She misses us."  

            Peter tilted his head and nodded slowly, reached out to give Jubilee a one-arm hug that pushed her over her control.  "We miss you too, Little One," catching the single tear with his forefinger.  "Don't cry."  

            Shaking her head, Jubilee gave a watery laugh and rubbed her face dry.  She could never seem to get through the program without breaking into tears at least once.  The picnic blanket seemed to get more crowded every year.  And every year, it gets harder and harder not to cry.  

            Taking deep breath, she let herself calm down before telling them, "It's my birthday today."

            "Happy Birthday!" Illyana said cheerfully and knocked over her cup to give Jubilee a hug.  "How old are you now?"

            "Sixteen today," she replied, letting go slowly.  Illyana looked exactly as she had been the day she passed on, a beautiful child of ten.  

            "Sweet Sixteen," Everett said with a smile.  "Any special plans?"

            "Wolvie is taking me to Rockefeller Center for lunch then shopping," she informed them and poured Illyana another glass of lemonade.  

            Talking with his mouth full as was his habit in life, Angelo wiped his greasy hands on his jeans.  "What are you planning on wrangling out of the old man?  Another silly hat?"

            Peter gave the Spanish kid a good frown.  "Logan's hat has special meaning for those that receives it from him."

            "It still looks horrible on Jubilee," Angelo informed him without the least bit of tact.  

            Mondo groaned.  "Angelo, my friend, do you not know that women have soft hearts.  Sentimental values sometimes outweigh even appearances."  He turned in that slow reassuring manner of his and smiled.  "Do not listen to him, Jubilee.  I think the hat looks beautiful on such a pretty lady."

            "Don't kiss up," Angelo muttered loud enough for everyone to hear.  

            "Thanks Mondo," Jubilee replied as she watched Everett studied her for a moment.  The computer had done an amazingly wonderful job in simulating the characteristics and all her friends, especially Peter Rasputin who had spent a great deal more time here.  For example, Everett was looking at her now as he had been when they lived at the Academy.  "What is it Everett?"

            "Sixteen," he mused.  "Has it been that long?"

            Her smile slipped away.  "Yeah."

            "Wow," he sighed.  "Time certainly passes fast."

            "Or at least it feels that way when we're here," Peter replied quietly as he ran a smooth hand over his sister's fine hair.  "It had been five years since Illyana left me when I left this earth."

            Angelo nodded.  "I'm not sure how long it's been since I…"

            "Four months, two weeks and five days," Jubilee replied.  

            Angelo turned to stare at her, his usually mocking eyes somberly sad.  "Don't count the days, Jubilee.  It's not healthy."

            "What do you expect me to do?" Jubilee asked, her eyes filling with tears again.  "I can't forget."

            "We don't expect you to," Everett replied quietly.  "But don't count the days.  Don't keep reliving the moments."

            Jubilee shook her head.  "They are all I have left of you guys."  She gave them a smile.  "Illyana's been gone for six, Mondo's been gone for four, Peter and you have been gone for two now and Angelo…" she stopped to give herself time to collect her pain.  "I don't even have pictures anymore.  They were all destroyed, either in the fire or…"  She turned to Angelo.  "They tore our apartment in L.A. apart then torched it.  There's nothing left."

            Peter reached out and took her hand.  "You have memories.  You have friends and family.  And we will always live within you."

            "I miss you guys so much," she repeated with a sigh.

            "We know," Everett said sadly.  "We feel it."

            She nodded, getting to her feet.  "I should go.  The computer logs programs that run for more than ten minutes."

            "We know," they replied together.  

            "Can I come see you again soon?" she asked, as she does every time.

            "You can come anytime you like," Peter replied softly with a great deal of the gentle kindness that he always exhibited in life.  "We are always going to be here for you when you need us."

            "No matter what," Everett added with a nod.

            "We're a punch of a button away," Angelo said.

            "Never far from you heart," Mondo replied wisely.

            "Bring more lemonade next time," Illyana added cheerfully before getting up to give her a hug.  "We'll miss you."

            "I always miss you," she replied and stepped back from the figure figures that looked back reassuringly at her.  "Good bye," she whispered and turned her back.  She hated this part the most.  Tearing funning down her ace, "Computer, save and end program."  

            The bright sky and cheerful summer's day blinked out of existence and Jubilee couldn't stop herself from letting out a cry and fell to the floor.  She gave herself over to the grief and allowed all the tears she hides from the team to run free for a moment.  She missed them even more now than she did before.  Swallowing salty evidence of her constant battle with loss that refuse to be ebbed, she got slowly to her feet.  "Computer, lock program.  Access code only."

            "Program locked."

            She turned back to the empty room as the door slide open.  She stared at the empty space, still seeing their smiling faces as they waved good bye and knew that she'd be back soon.  Her time in L.A. had been the longest she's gone without these little tiny sessions.  She's never been able to stay away for long.  

            Walking out, she didn't know, didn't see, the lone figure in the shadowed observation dome who had been stealing a few moments away from night duty in the monitoring station.  Jubilee didn't see the tears of grief shed, not for lost friends, but for her lost innocence. "Computer, access JL13-E..."  

_Fin…_


End file.
